Fat Girls

You ever have a moment when you are discussing a topic you are passionate about, and all of the sudden the person you are having the conversation with has to say something negative?  Well if you haven’t, I’ve had my fair share of positive conversations gone negative.  But what sparks me to discuss this type of topic is to perhaps reach out to those who have a tendency to always see the glass half empty as a posed to seeing the glass half full like me.  I consider myself to be a confident, young insightful when necessary, and optimistic type of person, however even my confidence can be knocked out of me.  This topic is dedicated to the Fat Girls/Boys within all of us.  I particularly want to focus on women; because this is what I’m an expert in being a woman.  This maybe an extension to the Government Regulations blog, but now I’m officially taking a stand for the Fat Girls!

I am tired of people putting Fat Girls in a box, and dictating what we should eat, how we should look, how we should feel, how we should behave, and what we should be wearing.  Now with that said if I decide to discuss what I am eating or trying to apply in my own home this is not the time for anyone to judge or make a comment about what I am doing.  If I choose to wear something like a bathing suit, alter top, daisy dukes, mini skirt, etc this is my choice.  I personally may not wear some of these items, but maybe when I am feeling confident in myself I may choose to do so, but what I do not need are the looks of disgust and judgment.   If and when I am eating out and I have a chef salad, but would like to have a slice of cheesecake this again is my choice.  Again, I don’t need the look nor do I need your comments. 

To all of the judgers of the Fat Girls in the world this is what I want to say on behalf of all of the Fat Girls or women with self image problems.  Our weight does not determine who we are as people; some of us are doing much greater things then those who are judging us for our weight.  Some of us Fat Girls can run a ½ marathon better than those judgers.  We are fabulous and fierce women with a few more pounds of love to share.  We are Fat Girls with education, career oriented, talented, and business owners and we are also mothers, wives, girlfriends, sisters, aunts, and daughters.  We have feelings and thoughts with substance we do not focus our lives around food.  We are empowered and strong in our own individual ways.  As Fat Girls we find ways to survive the negativity that is brought to us by our judgers in the world.  So before you pass another judgment on a Fat Girl remember she is someone special too.  Do not have pity on her; she is very aware of who she is as an individual and does not need anyone to focus on her weight, but simply focus on the person she is.  Instead take the time and get to know her, and what she is doing to empower other women in the world. 

***To all of the Fat Girls I hope I represented us well.***

House of Dragonflies

A few weeks ago I had a wonderful conversation with a dear friend of mine discussing my new blog site House of Dragonflies.   However, this same friend is the person who introduced me to the symbolism of dragonflies and how much I could personally relate to them.  So of course I was excited to tell her she inspired the name House of Dragonflies.  But, she then asked me a significant question why name it “House of Dragonflies, instead of Dragonflies?”  I thought the question was direct, but it was a little different than the other questions I get about the blog site name.  So, I told her my theory behind the name House of Dragonflies.

The name House of Dragonflies symbolizes all of my close friends, clients, and students who have impacted my life in a positive way; although most of them will never have the opportunity to meet they are all together in the “house” (blog).  The dragonflies embody the wholeness of everyone, each person changing and progressing individually, searching for their purpose in life, living moment by moment, and not living in fear. The house stands for a home in which all of the dragonflies created together to have a sense of establishment, wholeness, freedom, confidence, belief, hope, safety, honesty, loyalty, and love.  And around the house are small ponds, beautiful flowers and trees, in which the dragonflies can fly to from time to time for privacy to have oneness with the universe and God. 

After describing where the name House of Dragonflies came from she asked me another interesting question.  She  said “I know you love trees, and dragonflies, but what I observe in your own house is you have several different pictures of “houses” whether it’s the exterior or interior of a house you have a lot of pictures of different houses. “   I began to think about it and she was actually right I have at least 3 different types of pictures just in my living room and dining room (these 2 rooms are conjoined) alone.  She said to me again you should really look deeper and figure out why you have so many pictures of houses in your life and what the symbolism of a house is to you. 

As always I’ve began this Google search on what is the symbolism of a house, I’ve asked God to show me what it means, and I’ve shared this same topic with a few other friends too, and the only answer I received was get your house in order!  I realize since my husband and I have been together we have never fully unpack any of our boxes once we move into a new house, we take out what we need and live off of those items until it is time to move again.  (Like a typical dragonfly waiting for more change.)  I’ve always felt homeless in our own house.  But what I’ve learned is in order for me to reach out to others the way I want to we have to have our house in order because we can’t give what  we don’t have.  For the past few days my husband and I have been getting our house in order.  So to all of my beautiful dragonflies in the world take time to flap your wings and get yourself in order, and then maybe you’ll be able to soar into life. 

Sources:  http://www.dragonfly-site.com/meaning-symbolize.html

Feature Topic on YouTube

Aside from blogging I am doing some "ghostwriting" for a friend of my who would like to have open discussions each week on YouTube.  Here's what he will be discussing his first week on YouTube.

In today’s society we live in a world in which people are conditioned to not see the truth. So many people who are in power have a following and an opportunity to uplift those who are following them, but never capitalize on the opportunity. However, those leaders who try to uplift their following by speaking the truth are the many fallen soldiers who are murdered by wicked and delinquent leaders of our nations.
I would like to take this perspective of leaders from a musical stand point since music is the universal language of the world. However I would like to focus on some of the influential pioneers of hip-hop over the past 10-15 years like Jay-Z, Lil’ Wayne, Common, 2Pac, and Nas, and how their careers have been altered through marketing and media. First let’s look at Jay-Z and Lil’ Wayne who has both grown into enormous and dominant figures, yet their music does not encourage or lift people to their full capacity. On the other hand, you have Common who spoke of truth through his music, but now you see him in movies where his words are controlled by a script. 2Pac however was a vigorous force through his compelling thoughts, words, and music, but he’s no longer with us to articulate the truth or share his knowledge. Now, we have Nas who speaks from the heart, but can’t seem to get proper marketing to share his knowledge.
So the questions I ask myself often are: Do the leaders of our nations believe we the people do not want the knowledge or truth? Perhaps this is why the media has so, much control over what we see as people…Or is it easier as a leader to lead the blind? But imagine if all of us as people started to seek the knowledge and truth, and begin to realize how suppressed and oppressed we are as a community, and how much power one leader or leaders have over us as a population.
***Once I find out his user name information on YouTube I'll post it on my blog page for anyone who is interested in taking a stand.***

Government Regulations

Have you ever monitor your diet?  Count calories?  Check the labels for sugar, fiber, and fat content?  Well I've had my fair share of Weight Watchers, whey protein, high protein, low protein, smoothies, no meat, and I even purchase a juicer to detox.  Well I believe I have discovered the next FAD Diet, its called the Government Food program. Yes folks its the Government food program! So here's how it works you apply for the program for your employer and the government sends you to an intense training program to learn how to implement this new food program.  As you sit through the many hours of training you will learn how to calculate how much food you have to purchase for each individual meal, and for how many people.  By doing this you will now be an expert in Government food calculations.  Now, that you have figured out how much food you need to purchase its now time to purchase all of this fabulous food at the grocery store.  Oh I failed to mention you can only have 8 oz of milk at each meal and that's 1% milk for anyone above the age of 6, and you can have water any time of the day.  So if you have to feed 20 plus people you may be purchasing 21 gallons of 1% milk.  Since you'll be purchasing so, much milk you may need to bring a friend to help you push all of this milk around while you grab the 4 pounds of individual different types of fruits and veggies, which ultimately you may have up to 40 pounds fresh produce.  Oh did I forget to mention you are allowed 2 oz of meat during lunch and dinner?  And as far as breakfast goes if you want a bagel or something you can have 1/2 of a bagel and a 1/2 cup of fruit.  So, if you just read this entire blog I hope you are getting light headed from the calculations and the lack of food you will be eating once you prepare it.  My advice to you is if you plan to follow this fabulous FAD diet brought to you by the Government please stay away from family and friends the first 3 days as your body is going through a serious DETOX due to the lack of sugar in your system, and you may try to take a bite out of your baby brother because he's sweet. (*giggle*)  You may feel cranky, tired, irritable, hungry, and ready to eat the sole of your shoe, but hang in there it will all be over soon.  And if someone decides not to eat a meal you are providing then the government will not pay for that precious meal you slaved over all day in the kitchen.  Also you better make sure you are documenting everyone whose eating and not eating, and God forbid you have an office party, because you can only eat donated food during snack time.  Well I hope you enjoy your new diet program I'm dying to find out your progress.       

***Food for Thought:  By the way these Government food programs are being used now in our head start programs, school districts, local shelters, and adult care centers.*** 

Darkness

This week I was planning to talk about how I came up with the name House of Dragonflies, however this is not the direction I feel I need to go.  I have to be more truthful with myself and my actions, and hold myself to some sort of accountability.  So I would like to share with you my life in the past few weeks.

 I have been living in a shadow of Darkness, and have avoided all things I am familiar with whether it was family, friends, school, and work too some degree.  I did not realize how far off the loop I had fallen until a dear friend of my literally brought me back into the light.  See I work in a Domestic Violence Shelter, and this same friend told me I must be a strong person to work in such a setting.  I never really understood what she meant until a few days ago.  However, even the strong become weak.  I work the evening shift 3 nights a week, I sacrifice being away from my best friend/husband 3 days out of the week to help those who have been abuse mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, etc.  When I am there through the night I listen to so many depressed, manipulated, emotional, etc, (I could go on) thoughts of women who need guidance, and a little ray of hope.  I work under a management team who believes in working bank hours, and co-workers who choose to sleep while working, avoid cleaning, attack others who are doing their job.  Again I work nights I should not be able to see any of this, but I do.  Again, I only work 3 days out of the week, but it has turned into my life!  Work has become so overwhelming that we have been training, and having staff meetings on my off days, and on days when I was just getting off from work.  I am exhausted, and I am not a super woman, my mind and body may be weak, but I will survive. 

Although all of things have been happening I never turned my back on God, who has literally strengthened me.  I have never been the type to just pick up a bible and begin to read bible stories, but during my time of darkness reading my bible stories is exactly what I needed.  I have read the story of Job, Daniel, and few other Psalms, and Proverbs.  I realize this is not much but it was what I needed to see.  I needed to see how God was working on people of faith, and how others around them would react.  So I have decided for the first time in my life I am not going to lose my faith, but to simply look to God who strengthens me, and guides my steps every day.  I will not allow people to defeat me anymore, and control what God has destine in my life for me to do.  I will continue to praise him in my darkest hours, and in times of joy.  I will speak of the truth and continue to pray and ask God for his guidance every day. 

Crack Please!

Have you ever been sitting in a conference room waiting for a meeting to start daydreaming about life, grocery list, people you need to call, and then all of the sudden everyone you’ve been waiting for to start the meeting begin to file into conference room?  Well had one of these moments last week at work.  I was one of the first people to arrive simply because I just got off from work myself, and I just needed to pick up some coffee so I could survive another meeting with human resources.  As always I greet everyone as they come into the conference room to sit down and get themselves situated.  As I watch everyone come into the room I can’t help observe everyone’s behavior, style, attitude, and friendliness whether they wanted to be friendly with this person or not.  Meanwhile I check my phone for any miss calls or text messages and sip on my coffee and wait patiently.  After 15 minutes of waiting for the “big wigs” to show up I realize all of the seats were taken in the room and the only seat left was the ottoman, and to my surprise my supervisor was the only one without a seat.  It was quite funny to watch her spin around and do this weird production like someone was going to give up their comfortable seat just for her.  Finally she sat down on the ottoman, which was directly in front of me, and that’s when I was exposed to the dreaded BUTT CLEVEAGE!!!!   You know I’ve heard about this new trend women are doing these days, but I guess I wasn’t prepare to see this at a 9:00 a.m.  meeting while drinking my morning coffee and trying to mind my business.  And not only was I exposed to BUTT CLEVEAGE I was tortured with knowing what colored underwear my supervisor was wearing for 3 hours!!!!  I mean how embarrassing is this????  How can I take someone with a Master’s degree in social work serious when their running around with BUTT CLEVEAGE at a meeting with every single employee present?????  I guess I have to share this story to simply say this, if you are wearing dress slacks and your pants do not fit…..get your pants altered to fit you, and if you can’t afford the alterations wear a freaking belt!!!! Just always remember there is always someone behind you when you’re not aware.